Oh, if using XIM4 with iOS the instructions are the same. It's good to know that it works with another phone now.
I would use these steps next.
Verify other phone's bluetooth is disabled
Close Manager on iPhone
Unplug APEX
Reboot phone
Verify bluetooth is enabled
Verify airplane mode is disabled
Connect APEX to console
Open Manager and press the XIM button while the connect screen is up
Verify a cyan and green flash shows when pressing XIM's button